The only thing worse than a stranger who doesn’t discipline their own child, is when they discipline yours.
Elizabeth had just come back from a business trip and was feeling guilty for not spending time with her children. It was raining, so she decided to take her 14 month old son and 3-1/2 old daughter to play in the kid area of the local shopping mall. They have a big foam ferry boat where kids can climb on top and run through the tunnel underneath.
“My son was going through an unpleasant biting stage, so I was watching him like a hawk. My daughter was sitting quietly at the end of tunnel. She didn’t seem to be bothering anyone and kids were running by her without any problem. The next thing I know, a totally stranger yanks my daughter out of the tunnel, saying, “You stop being mean and get out of the way.”
Elizabeth was there in a heartbeat, “Don’t you manhandle my child. If you have a problem, you talk to me,” she said.
“Your daughter is just mean,” the other mother started yelling at Elizabeth, getting in her face and suggesting, “Maybe you should get out of here.” Elizabeth started shaking. “I was so surprised and overwhelmed, didn’t know how to react. I was literally in tears. I couldn’t even believe another parent would do that. I left that day and avoided the boat for a long time after that.”
Elizabeth is not alone. Many of us have experienced that flight or fight impulse when another parent threatened us in front of our children. Has that ever happened to you? What did you do?
One Comment
I think there is a big difference between someone yelling at/verbally abusing your child or you and someone disciplining your child. I actually really appreciate it when other parents correct my child’s manners, tell them not to hit the other child or whatever as a) I can’t watch them every moment b) it reinforces the fact that rules are rules and everyone agrees on them and c) adults are in authority and need to be listened to. Yelling at or verbally abusing my chuld as in your example is totally unacceptable by anyone.