I was at a party this weekend where the majority of the parents present were tutoring their kindergarteners. Let me say that again. TUTORING THEIR KINDERGARTENERS.
Clearly I am the ultimate slacker mom as I am impressed that they do anything other than nap in kindergarten. The fact that my daughter is learning to read and write – Gravy. The fact that she has homework every night – Annoying. But I do it. The idea of getting her tutoring on top of all this – Mind Blowing. Let me say it again – tutoring for kindergarten.
Has our society grown so competitive that we now must start tutoring before first grade? Have I already done my 5 year old a great disservice by not starting tutoring now? If other parents are tutoring in kindergarten, what does this mean for the upper grades? When did childhood get so intense and how to I get off the merry-go-round without guaranteeing my children a lifetime in remedial classes?
Has anyone else been shocked by academic competitiveness that starts so young? What have you done? Jump on the tutoring bandwagon? Relax in the fact that your kid seemed to be on track and let them, gasp, actually enjoy their childhood?
5 Comments
Cindy raises excellent points. The issue is not about helping a child that is struggling. The real issue is helping children who are ahead get even more ahead so that the gap is wider. It is getting to the point where everyone is tutoring, whether their child struggles or not, so if you don’t tutor, you are suddenly doing your child a disservice. Again, I am not speaking to those who clearly need help catching up, but to the rest of the class who in kindergarten is already moving the bar higher through external pressures.
Mommy Manners
someone commented on the blog that the teacher recommended tutoring for their kindergartner so they’re doing it. it breaks my heart — i can’t believe the pressure we are putting on these kindergartners and ourselves with tutoring.
The above was posted on F/B in response to a post I made here. If all kindergarteners are expected to be at a certain reading level by the end of the year by the school (and this is statewide), whether you agree with the standard or not, and your child was behind, would you not help them? Or would you do nothing because you don’t believe in learning that much in kindergarten? Would you let them be even farther behind in 1st Grade? This person who posted the above F/B comment probably didn’t have children who struggled. How is 45 minutes a week of extra help a bad thing if that child is the only one in the class who can’t keep up? I don’t feel pressured. I’m happy there are resources available for my child to keep up with the other kids. There’s no reason to make her struggle next year by not getting her a little extra help this year.
tutors are around for like an hr or two most of the time and I don’t think that that amount of time can possibly ruin all the fun of a childhood. lets pretend your child was struggling in Kindergarten with learning to read or math Kids not parents but KIDS know who the “dumb” ones are I was in the special math class in 1st- 5th grade and was bullied because of it If my parents would have had the resources to get me a little help early on My whole life could be different I don’t have a bad life I’m very happy exactly how things are but my childhood would actually have a lot happier memories if I had gotten a tutor before first grade or well any time but before Kids started picking on me for being in the slower math class it still effects my life today I was never confident in math I would have my bachelors degree right now if I wouldn’t have lost so many credits to failing math courses. I’m sorry to say it and it is not meant to cause you guilt but yes it really can effect the rest of your life if you are behind in school even in the beginning- baby is waking no time to make this read like an educated person wrote it sorry folks
There is absolutely nothing wrong in getting your child help. It just makes me sad that kindergarten has become so competitive that families already feel like their children are behind. Other families are worried that their children won’t be able to compete, so they jump on the tutoring bandwagon and pretty soon everyone, even those who are not behind are being tutored. I certainly did not mean to offend anyone who is using a tutor. I’m just a little shocked that it has become so widespread in elementary school.
Our kindergarten daughter has a tutor for reading because she is behind the other students. This was recommended by her teacher. It’s to keep her up to speed and not to have her fall behind even more. It has nothing to do with being competitive. I have haven’t in either of my children’s kindergarten classes run into parents who have tutors for “academic competitiveness”. Is there something wrong with getting your child help if they can’t keep up?